Dear lovely people of Trinity,
The end of summer has arrived and it always means it’s time for my annual visit the eye doctor. I guess I never got out of my ‘new school year prep’ routine. Lucky me and this year I needed to update my prescription. Let’s hope this astigmatism stabilizes some day soon or things could get interesting. After trying on just about every frame in the office, I had a nice little pile of ‘maybes’. I made my way through the pile a few times and just could not make a decision. Should I get something pretty similar to what I have now? Should I take advantage of the opportunity to try something totally different? Can I get away with that color? People still need to respect me after all 😊 Erik basically just said, no glitter. The lady helping me was very kind, but she needed to move on with her day, so she suggested I take the frames home for a week in a nifty case.
I’m not a particularly indecisive person. Especially when it comes to things that, at the end of the day, are not the most consequential. I just need a pair of glasses that are comfortable, make me feel confident, and that make all the blurry things crisp and clear. These kinds of decisions are not usually a problem for me, but day three with the frames and the nifty case and still no decision and I was beginning to wonder why I was making this so hard. Do you ever find there are times when you have undergone a lot of change and all of a sudden you just can’t handle even the idea of a small change? Do you ever find yourself tired out after making a number of challenging decisions in life and even small decisions become way harder than normal? This has been true for me in the past, but I really didn’t realize that I was feeling fatigued in this way until my total lack of ability to simply pick a pair of eye glasses.
I think this phenomenon often occurs in congregations as well. Even at times when we might feel excited about the prospect of a change, when it comes down to the particulars, when it comes down to making decisions, big or small, taking the plunge can be way harder than it needs to be. It’s ok. We all have our limits. But I think in those moments it helps to pay attention. It helps to stop, make note, and ask honest questions when the inability to make simple decisions or implement simple changes becomes debilitating. We can investigate what might be standing in our way. We can share our observations with someone we trust. We can laugh at ourselves for how absurd daily life often is! It’s amazing how disarming it can be, for all the things we build up in our minds, to ask, “Why am I taking this so seriously?”
For all the big and all the little things that you attend to each day as we make our way into fall, I pray for moments of clarity, breaths of refreshing grace, and a whole lot of cleansing laughter.
Yours in Christ,
Pastor Megan finds that she rarely has all the right answers, but tries to help her community ask better questions.